There are excellent ways to handle overwhelm, but most of us haven’t learned them… Yet.
You are a highly capable individual and an ambitious business owner, and I'm willing to bet that you sometimes struggle with overwhelm.
Hi, my name's Lorna, and I want to help you handle overwhelm better.
Social media is brimming with ‘tips to reduce overwhelm’ for business owners. ‘Handle your overwhelm in three easy steps’ ‘use this matrix’ ‘do this daily plan’. Well-intentioned, definitely, and I admit, I’ve written posts like that before. But one of the most common problems I see for business owners facing overwhelm is not about knowing the ‘top tips’ to deal with it. It’s that they’re not meeting it for what it really is. What do I mean?
Allow me to caveat this by saying that no, it’s not a one-size-fits-all, and yes, there are lots of variations on what I’m going to say. However, broadly speaking, there are two types of overwhelm people experience. One is the massive to-do list and a hundred spinning plates. Then there’s the type which is not about tasks, it’s about the ego. Better said, it’s about what you believe about yourself as a business owner and the deepest need to be congruent with your self-concept. Without a thorough understanding of which one is in play, you’ll struggle to take dominion (not control) over it.
What kind of overwhelm do you have?
I conducted a little experiment recently. I was feeling overwhelmed with all the stuff rattling around in my head. I needed to capture it all and not miss anything. “Hi Chat, I’m going to reel off all the things on my mind, and I want you to create a to-do list with relevant dates and a logical order for everything”. After I finished rambling, ChatGPT produced my list. There were over 60 items on it. Admittedly, I am busy. I co-own three businesses, have my coaching practise, I’m a mummy with busy kids, I’m a wife, manage a home, run a holiday let, blah blah blah. Sometimes, I’m just common-all-garden overwhelmed.
But what about the time when my client said, “I’m so overwhelmed with it all” and when asked “with what?” she noticed there wasn't actually much on her to-do list. What about the time when I sat at my desk to get working on one project and I felt so overwhelmed by it, I eventually spiralled all the way down to ‘who do I think I am taking this on?’. When the only thing you had to do that day was show up, but this huge ‘it’s too much’ story got in your way. What kind of overwhelm was that? No Eisenhower Matrix is going to sort that for you.
In her self-help journal ‘Words to Live By’, Donna Ashworth talked of overwhelm and “the parts that are exaggerated by ego” and it showed me she thinks (a little) like I do on this. Overwhelm is a symptom manufactured by the ego. In my coaching methodology, the ego is not the ‘enemy’. It is hugely valuable, often fearful, and needs to be cared for. A lot of our overwhelm comes from being in an unfamiliar state (perhaps beyond our comfort zone), showing up in ways we haven't done before (giving rise to self-doubt or ‘imposter syndrome’), and undertaking new tasks in a new role (being a learner who will fail sometimes). Who we believe we are and what we think we’re capable of requires an upgraded self-concept and an identity shift that often upsets our nervous system and felt experience.
Are there any 'top tips' that can help?
So what are the ‘top tips’ for managing this kind of overwhelm? It would trivialise your experience to break it down in a ‘simple’ way, but permit me to offer you this. When overwhelm is present, allow it to be there, take a breath and approach with curiosity. Question if it’s because there's too much ‘stuff’ or if it's something else? If it’s something else, notice that overwhelm is a visitor who has something to say. What could it really be trying to tell you? What protection is it trying to offer you?
How I help
I am a Mastery Method Coach. I use a blend of mindset coaching, pattern recognition, emotion navigation, and somatic self-mastery. I coach you to master the methods you need to skillfully navigate your experiences with overwhelm, procrastination, self-doubt and a host of other normal challenges for small business owners. If you want that chance to step out of the old and into the new, reach out to me. I’d love to hear from you.
The best way to contact me is at lornataylorcoach@gmail.com or find me on
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/lorna-taylor-4056a2292/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lornataylorcoach
